- timothy over here askin’ for nudes when all u did was say hello
- connor who won’t calm down with his axe spray tryna infect ya lungs
- colin adding #420 to his bio when he smoked weed one time
- gregory mad cause u didn’t blow him after the first date
how to spot a fuckboy:
- white nike tube socks with his adidas sandals
- he wants to play 20 questions (!!!!!!!!! do not play !!!!!!!!!!! especially if there’s a “;)” involved)
- relies on his mom but doesn’t respect women
- looks like he just read one of jaden smith’s tweets in all of his selfies
- can’t find the clitoris
fuckboys come in all shapes and sizes and results may vary but when he a fuckboy…he a fuckboy…and u will know
“and i said to my body. softly. ‘i want to be your friend.’ it took a long breath. and replied, ‘i have been waiting my whole life for this.’”
- Chocolate: Raw nuts/seeds.
- Oily/Fatty Snacks: Kale, leafy greens.
- Soda/Carbonated Drinks: Actual, literal bubbles.
- Chips/Salty Food: Topsoil.
- Cookies: Freudian psychology.
- Sweet Tea: A strong Southern gentleman to take care of you.
- Pasta/Carbs: Pasta/Carbs.
- Ice: The sweet release of death.